At a recent “Porn Harms” conference, Josh McDowell told a story of a mom that could not find her cell phone. She had looked in all the normal places and finally decided to ask her 10year old son if he had seen her phone but she could not find him either. Going to his room she found the door shut. When she entered the room, her son jumped and tried to hide the phone under his shirt.
The ensuing exchange was not confrontational. The mom handled it very well simply by asking questions about what he was looking at and why. Her son said boys at school used the word “t _ t _” in talking about a particular part of the female anatomy. He did not know what that word meant so he went to Google for an answer. And this is why in large part that 10 is the average first age of exposure to pornography.
“… and your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.” – Matthew 6:18b. Jesus uses this opportunity to expose hypocrites who do everything for show, to convey how righteous they are. But all is seen by the Father. Christian homes can put up a pretty good front of invulnerability as well. But behind closed doors inappropriate movies are watched, the Internet is surfed and smart phones are used for sexting and snapchatting. An “Open Door Policy” in the home is important to help minimize this risk:
- No televisions behind closed doors;
- No phones behind closed doors; and
- No computers (or smart phones) behind closed doors.
Josh McDowell made the comment after the above referenced story that Google is the new sex education resource. Parents must take the initiative to keep doors open and talk about sexuality and healthy relationships often with their kids. Tim Mavergeorge and Laura Gallier emphasize this point as well at the “Let’s Talk About Porn, Parenting through the porn problem” conferences. It is no longer about “the talk”, it is about a number of talks – a dialogue that starts at a very young age and continues through high school.
Prayer guide: My Father, thank You for Your word and Your love. I confess that I often put up a wall of invulnerability - that I am fine, my family is fine, all is fine. But You know different. Forgive me. Help me be more vulnerable, to keep doors open in the home to convey it is only by Your grace and accountability to each other that we can navigate through the temptations we all face daily. Help us as a family to accept the vulnerability that goes with addressing tough topics such as sexuality and healthy relationships. May our home and the Church always be safe places for discussion around challenges kids and families face today. Thank You Jesus. Amen.
A faithful father maintains an open-door policy and leads spiritually by example.