He was playing golf on a Saturday morning again. It was business. On the 13th hole, already four hours into the round he was busted. Work required a good bit of travel and customer interaction but at that moment as a young father he realized that he was consistently compromising time with his family for the sake of his career.
Man can be selfish. Words like “competitive” or “driven” put a nice spin on it but is still being selfish. Today’s focus on selfies, self-improvement, self-actualization, self-realization, self-motivation and the WIFM(What’s in it for me) mentality can isolate men and destroy marriages. Selfless improvement is key for being the husband our wives need. Another level of selflessness is necessary to mature as the father our kids need.
“I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from My Father I have made known to you.” – John 15:15. “Do not hold on to Me, for I have not yet ascended to the Father. Go instead to My brothers and tell them, ‘I am ascending to My Father and your Father, to My God and your God.’” – John 20:17. The disciples matured under the teaching of Jesus the Christ. They grew as servants to friends and from friends to brothers. With each step came a new level of selflessness, a responsibility to mature beyond self. “Whoever wants to be My disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow Me.” – Luke 9:23. The cross may be a valley in marriage, the burden of providing for a family or the challenge of raising a godly generation in such a crazy world. The word is to mature beyond self under Christ as His yoke is easy (Matt.11:30).
The young dad retired from golf that day and began an intentional effort to manage his business travel in order to limit the number of nights away from his family. He confessed his selfish nature and asked his wife to forgive him. The challenge was on to mature as the husband and father his family needed. He enlisted a couple of battle buddies - men at his church that had been in the corporate world, to hold him accountable on the journey. They have and his marriage & family have been blessed as a result.
Prayer guide: My Father, thank You for the wake-up calls in life. What a blessing it is to hear Your voice when I have allowed worldly priorities to distract me. Your grace, Your love and Your word provide the motivation be more selfless every day. I accept responsibility to mature beyond self under Christ to become the man, husband and father You call me to be, that my family needs. Amen.
A faithful father matures beyond self under the Word of God.