His teenage son walked in the room and said, “Dad, can we talk? I have been struggling with pornography for over two years and I need your help to quit this.” Ken’s first reaction was anger but he kept it in check. The second emotion experienced was embarrassment because he struggled with pornography as well. His inclination was to hide his embarrassment with anger toward his son. That would give him cover and shut down the conversation he did not want to have. But Ken was convicted to do better than that.
Ken sat down and talked with his son about how beautiful women are – that is what Adam meant when he said, “Bone of my bones. Flesh of my flesh.” He was saying, “Wow!” God did not just make woman beautiful, He made her relational – “It is not good for man to be alone.” God wanted man to experience the same intimate relationship with woman that He wanted with mankind. Ken went on to explain how pornography is built on the lie that sexual performance is foundational for relationship when it is actually just the opposite – healthy relationship is foundational for sexual intimacy.
Be a Father: “Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.” – Hebrews 13:4. God’s design for marriage is the closest thing to a relationship with Jesus the Christ in this world. Intimacy in that relationship glorifies God and gives fathers & mothers the opportunity to raise godly offspring.
Ken did not want to have that talk with his son. But as they talked, he realized the dialogue around the topic of healthy relationships and sex was way overdue. Ken shared things with his son he had not shared before including his struggles with pornography. Today they are battle buddies that hold each other accountable to stay clean on this front. They utilize Covenant Eyes to verify that neither is visiting inappropriate websites.
A heads up to all parents – Pornography is the “New Drug”. The average age of 1st time exposure to pornography is eleven and 12–17 year olds are the largest porn consumers! Join other dads & moms for a parenting forum to get up to speed on this “New Drug”. Scheduled for Sunday evening, October 18th, at Chapelwood UMC in Houston, the event is called, “Let’s Talk About Porn – Parenting through the porn problem.” Come and learn strategies to inspire your kids to avoid pornography and equip them with the tools to resist looking. Click on letstalkaboutporn.com for more info and to register for the event.
Prayer guide: Lord, thank You for Your Word, Your love and for marriage. You have provided the foundation for us to build upon. Help me as a dad to stand in the gap for the next generation and rebuke the devil’s schemes. Equip me as a father in marriage & family to keep the home a “safe place” to discuss relationships and sex. Amen.
A faithful father is a dad that stands in the gap for the next generation.