Kids spell love T - I – M - E. That is time with you, dad. Our son and daughter-in-law just had their second child, a little girl. I dutifully handed the veteran dad his second jar of 936 marbles when they brought the newborn home. There are 936 weeks from birth to age 18. Taking a marble out of the jar every week is a visible reminder of time passed and time ahead.
Time gets by quickly! Every week or weekend presents unique opportunities to invest well in the father-child relationship. The challenge is to be tuned-in to circumstances in order to recognize and enjoy the opportunities before us. Work, travel and busy-ness can distract but the visual of a jar of marbles can help dads refocus on right priorities.
For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted; a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down , and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; – Ecclesiastes 3:1-4. And God is in the middle of all times. Certainly, sometimes we have no idea what He is up to but He is God, and He is sovereign over all things. Oswald Chambers has said, “Man cannot do what God does, and God will not do what man can do.” There are three seasons of fathering: Teacher – the first 10yrs of a child’s life; Coach – ages 10 – 20; and, Counselor – grown kids, age 20 plus. And there is a time, an opportunity as weeks pass during each season that a dad can be intentional about making a memory or coordinating an activity that will strengthen the foundational father-child relationship. And, however the week goes, be it a good week or a rough week, it is dad’s job at the end of the week to remind each child how much he or she is loved.
In a recent presentation on Starting a Fathering Movement in your Church, I shared this insight on the jar of marbles. I said that one way to know that a fathering movement is underway in the Church when every new dad has a jar of 936 marbles waiting for him when he and his bride with child return home from the hospital or birthing center. One ministry leader let me know he had ordered five jars with marbles during the balance of my talk to give to five young dads in his church. I like it when God does that!
Prayer guide: Thank You Lord for Your word and the time granted to raise the children You bless my bride and I with. I confess I allowed busy-ness to distract me early in my fathering journey. Four hundred marbles were gone before I realized how absent I was. Forgive me. I want to emulate You as the father You call me to be. Help me prioritize my physical presence, engage emotionally and lead spiritually by example every week of my children’s lives. Grant me clarity to invest well as I point to You, honor You and glorify You in the time I have with each child. That is the dad You call me to be, and that’s the dad my kids need to see. Amen.
A faithful father invests well in the TIME available.
