When did you become a man? Was there a particular time or event at which you recognized that you had indeed moved from boyhood to manhood? Maybe it was graduation from high school or bootcamp; getting your license or getting married. Or are you one of the rare men who was raised by a dad that provided a clear understanding of what being a man was all about and knighted you into manhood in your late teens?

Robert Lewis provides a beautiful picture of what that blessing or knighting looks like in his book, Raising a Modern Day Knight. In the early 2000’s, he also introduced the men of his church in Little Rock, Arkansas, to a very tight, simple, biblically grounded definition of manhood in his “Quest for Authentic Manhood” study.

So it is written: “The first man Adam became a living being”; the last Adam, a life-giving spirit. The first man was of the dust of the earth; the second man is of heaven. As was the earthly man, so are those who are of the earth; and as is the heavenly man, so also are those who are of heaven. – 1Corinthians 15:47-48. Manhood is bigger than us, bigger than our individual experiences growing up. A good man will make good choices for the most part, practice personal discipline and work to discern through distractions. He generally exhibits good character. Adam was a good man. He made good choices for the most part in tending the garden. He was disciplined in his will to obey God. But the temptation that he could be like God distracted him from his leadership role and he failed to love and protect the woman he was given. Jesus, the second Adam, is the standard bearer for manhood. He did the work to live a sinless life and redeem the lost. He was disciplined in His will to obey all the way to the cross. And He displayed selfless, sacrificial love for His woman, the Church through His death and resurrection. Through comparison of these two biblical examples, Robert Lewis identified four dimensions of manhood on display through Jesus’ life – He rejected passivity, accepted responsibility, led courageously and invested eternally. Every man is charged to be more Christ-like by growing in each of these dimensions of manhood.

With the cultural confusion today around differences between men and women, masculinity and femininity, it is good to find clarity in the word of God. As you discern through your unique charge with the work you have been given to do, your will to obey a sovereign Lord and your intentionality to selflessly and sacrificially love the woman you married, take stock of how well you reject passivity, accept responsibility, lead courageously and invest eternally. Commit to progress toward authentic manhood.

Prayer guide: Lord, thank You for Your word and the example it provides for manhood. I confess that I simply worked to emulate men I admired in the workplace. I did not see Jesus as a man’s man. Forgive me. Where Adam stumbled, Jesus stood firm on His journey to redeem the lost by rebuking the devil’s temptations and obeying His father all the way to the point of death on a cross. Grant me strength Lord to be more Christ-like. Help me reject passivity, accept responsibility, lead courageously and invest eternally That is the man You call me to be and that is the man my kids need to see. Amen.

A faithful father commits to progress toward authentic manhood.