I had a car in high school that was a battle buddy car. I bought the car for a grand total of $100 in 1973 and quickly learned how to install brake pads, rebuild the carburetor, replace plugs, points and the condenser, tune the engine and trouble shoot the trifecta of the starter, battery and alternator. It was one of those three, the starter, battery or alternator that would inevitably fail on a snowy day in the Midwest when I was driving a group of us to school. It happened enough times that my buddies knew the drill – get out and push fast enough to where I could jumpstart the car by dropping the power-slide transmission to low, similar to popping the clutch with a manual transmission. If I was on my own, I would have been stranded.

That is my analogy for battle buddies in life. These were friends I was able to be vulnerable with – They knew I could not afford a better car so there was no pretense. Our perspective was that we had wheels and always managed to get from point ‘A’ to point ‘B’. When we broke down, we figured it out and got back on the road.

Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three stands is not quickly broken. – Ecclesiastes 4:12. Wise words from Solomon that apply to friends in life. As adult men, it is hard to find those kinds of friends. The tendency is to put up walls emotionally and spiritually to cover points of vulnerability. This isolation can produce a warped perspective that leads to rationalization, or even justification of something that is known to be wrong – viewing pornography, entertaining drugs or alcohol and falsifying expense reports come to mind. A man in this mode may be able to continue making it from point ‘A’ to point ‘B’ on the job most of the time but family and other relationships suffer. Eventually, a breakdown is inevitable.

What battle buddies do is provide a safe place to admit to points of vulnerability that are tied to childhood experiences or exposure to various temptations later in life. The goal is to be real about what is actively distracting one from right priorities. Battle buddies help provide a healthy perspective in the present, anticipate the breakdown around the corner and intervene as necessary. This is how marriages are saved, families are strengthened and a godly generation is raised.

To establish a group of battle buddies, work with the core group of dads in your church to initiate a group of three to five men, with at least one ‘seasoned’ father. If you do not have a Faithful Fathering core group in your church, contact Faithful Fathering by clicking HERE to discuss how to move forward. Another option in the Houston area is to contact FinD – Fellowship in Discipleship via info@FinDiscipleship.org. 

As you establish a group of battle buddies, you will glean valuable insight needed to navigate well through distractions in this world and stay on course as the man, husband and father you are called to be. And that’s the dad the next generation needs to see.

Prayer guide: Thank You Lord for Your word and for the group of men, battle buddies You have surrounded me with. These men have taught me the importance of vulnerability with brothers in Christ. It took a while but by Your grace, emotional and spiritual walls were broken down and real relationships resulted. Now, all are navigating well through circumstances and relationship challenges before us. Thank You Lord.

A faithful father establishes a group of battle buddies to navigate well in this world.